3 effective ways to stay strong-minded when it feels like you'll never lose weight
A few weeks ago, I was listening to Brooke Castillo’s podcast, The Life Coach School, and she was talking about how to stay strong-minded. As she was talking about how she works on her mindset, it made me think a lot about how you have to be strong-minded during a health and weight loss journey. There will be times when the weight feels like it’s melting off, and there will also be times when you feel like you’ll never lose another pound. You have to learn how to stay strong-minded during the difficult times of your weight loss journey if you want to make it back to the good times.
The biggest problem women, and especially busy mamas, run into when the weight loss slows or takes longer to come off than they would like, is that they think it’s not working. All the effort to eat healthy or go to the gym feels like a waste of time.
But, right when you’re in the thick of this feeling, that’s when your body is preparing to make big changes! You have to learn how to stay strong mentally so that you can see the progress you’ve been working towards!
When you’re feeling weak, mentally, it’s helpful to remember these three truths. You can lean on them to practice being mentally strong. As with anything in life, the more you practice being mentally strong, the easier it becomes!
Remember being healthy doesn’t require perfection
I don’t know how, or when, this happened, but somewhere along the way, we were all told that to be “healthy” we had to eat healthy foods and exercise 100% of the time. There shouldn’t be any sugary treats - no matter the occasion. And heaven forbid, you miss a gym sesh!
I hear from people all the time who were doing so well, then they went out with friends and ate something “bad” or were too exhausted to hit the gym one day and they felt like they failed. So, they gave up on all their healthy habits.
This all-or-nothing mindset will always fail you. Healthy living isn’t as restrictive as dieting! Dieting isn’t healthy living! They’re two separate things. And for far too long, we’ve treated them as one.
Losing weight and being healthy don’t require perfection. They do require awareness and consistency. I tell my clients to follow the 80/20 or 90/10 rules to reach their goals while still enjoying their food and their lives.
If you want to be healthy and still enjoy food, then you should eat healthy and within your boundaries 80% of the time. The other 20% of the time you can have a little bit of fun with your food!
However, if you’re on a mission to lose weight then you will need to be slightly more strict. You’ll want to stick to your boundaries 90% of the time instead of 80%.
But you’ll notice that in either scenario, it didn’t require 100% perfection! Even when you’re trying to lose weight and actively eating in a deficit, you don’t have to be perfect.
It’s amazing what can come from releasing the need to be perfect in your nutrition. So much mental strength can come from learning to eat within your boundaries and still have a donut on occasion.
Your future self can lead the way
I’m a big believer in dreaming big and imagining what I want my life to look like in the future. And it’s not because I’m an especially “woo-woo” person, but I have seen the power of dreaming big. I’ve taken time to think about what I want and then made choices that align with my goals.
If you haven’t done this yet, then you absolutely should! I ask all the women in my Macros Made Easy program to dream about what their healthiest self looks like.
Does the healthiest version of you eat out all the time or does she cook most nights?Does the healthiest version of you lift weights, run marathons, or practice yoga?
Does the healthiest version of you wake up early?
Does the healthiest version of you drink?
There are no right or wrong answers to these questions (you can drink and still be healthy!!) The most important part of this process is simply understanding what the healthiest version of you looks like.
Because you will use that version, that ideal you, to be your guiding star! When you’re stuck in a place that’s frustrating and it feels like you’ll never see progress again, you’re going to be tempted to throw in the towel and go back to your old ways. I call this the “oh screw it” phase.
In the “oh screw it” phase you don’t feel like your efforts are producing the results you’re looking for. But, before you eat a full sleeve of Oreos, you can ask, “Would the healthiest version of me eat a whole sleeve of Oreos?” Most likely, she wouldn’t. She might have one or two, but she wouldn’t mindlessly, or angrily, eat a whole sleeve of Oreos.
The healthiest version of you would stick with healthy habits like eating whole foods, moving your body, taking time to rest, etc.
Instead of letting the scale decide if you should keep going or give up, you get to be the compass. Mama, I know it sounds a little obvious and silly, but nothing feels better than taking back control of your health - especially from an inanimate object like the scale!
Become the example your kids need
Finally, I want to talk about possibly the most important reason that you should become strong-minded. Your kids.
My job is to help mamas lose weight and love the body they are in, but I don’t do it to help mamas “be skinny.” I teach mamas about nutrition and how to properly fuel their bodies because mamas are the leaders and teachers of the next generation.
Think about how you learned about healthy habits.
How and what to eat is taught at home. Very few people learn about nutrition from a professional, especially at a young age.
I absolutely love my mom, and I know she did her best for me, but when I left home I did not know how to fuel my body! Even during college when I was a two-sport athlete, I didn’t have anyone teaching me how to eat to build muscle, or how to fuel my body so I had the endurance to make it through my volleyball and softball games.
It wasn’t until after I had my three kids that I started learning about nutrition. At first, I felt so selfish about spending money on a nutrition coach and a gym membership. I thought I should have been spending that money on my kids!
But seven years later, I can tell you I did spend that money on my kids. Because I took the time, energy and resources to educate myself, I've given my kids an amazing gift.
My daughter knows what to eat before soccer practice to have the energy to play. My son hates veggies, but he understands why he needs to eat them. My youngest can pack her own lunch that fuels her to learn and play!
When my kids leave the house, they’ll know how to plan healthy meals, shop for groceries and cook nutritious meals. If I hadn’t taken the time to learn for myself and then teach my kids, they would struggle in the same ways I did!
It’s our job as parents to build on what our parents gave to us so that our kids can be better than we were. We are the example and we are the teachers.
Mama, you are strong. You have the power to make big waves in your family. Start by making your health needs a priority. Show your kids why healthy living is important.
Becoming strong-minded is a journey and it takes practice to get there. If you’re feeling weak-minded right now, that’s ok. I can lead you toward the healthiest version of yourself. Schedule a free discovery call with me to start understanding why diets keep failing you and how to turn things around.
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