Break the weight loss, weight gain cycle today by creating a non-food reward system for you and your family
In our culture, we use food as a reward for just about everything! If the kids get good grades we take them out to dinner. When we celebrate a birthday we eat cake and ice cream. When we make it through a week of healthy eating we reward ourselves by eating whatever we want on the weekends. It is so ingrained in us to use food as a reward that we can’t think of any other way to celebrate! However, changing this one habit can make a huge difference in your health and weight loss goals.
I see a lot of women who fall into the weight loss, weight gain cycle because they use food (or alcohol) as a reward of their “good” or healthy behavior. The way to get out of this cycle is to break free from the notion that food is a reward. There are so many ways we can reward ourselves that don’t have a single thing to do with food.
You can stop this habit not only for yourself but for your family too! I’m going to show you just how to do that!
Unlearn the habit of using food as a reward
This is the hardest step because changing our habits takes concentrated effort, especially where it has been ingrained in us for generations! First, let’s focus on why unlearning this habit is so beneficial.
One of the biggest reasons I don’t like using food as a reward is that it creates a bad relationship with food. A lot of times we use “bad” food to reward ourselves for the good work we’ve done. The first problem with this line of thought is that there are no good or bad foods. When we label food as good or bad we create restrictions for ourselves that lead to unhealthy relationships with food.
Our relationship with food impacts our physical health. If you eat a cookie as a reward for working out, but you’ve deemed eating cookies “bad,” you’ll either stress over the cookie, punish yourself for the cookie, or give up on healthy eating because you made one “bad” choice. All of these situations ultimately lead to weight gain.
If you hadn’t villainized that cookie as a “bad” food, you could have enjoyed your reward! It wouldn’t have impacted your health very much and you could keep going on your way. However, most people don’t recognize this cycle, and so they keep repeating it!
Before we move on to ideas for non-food rewards, I want to mention that it’s ok to occasionally use food as a reward or celebration. When it comes to food we don’t want to draw hard lines in the sand, we want to allow for flexibility!
It’s best to set up boundaries as to when you’ll use food as a reward. Maybe it’s based on time - like you only use it as a reward once a month. Or it could be based on a certain level of achievement - like when you reach a big goal.
The problem we fall into is using food as a reward too frequently. You don’t need to go out for ice cream every Friday night to celebrate making it through the week. That’s too often. Save that reward for a bigger celebration, like an anniversary! When you delay your gratification you end up appreciating the reward even more!
Find out what looks like a non-food reward for you?
Now that you know what you don’t want to do, we need to focus on what you do want to do! When you’re first starting out it can be difficult to come up with non-food reward ideas, but I promise, that as you start to come up with new ways to reward yourself your list will grow!
I like to create two types of reward ideas: ideas that cost money and ideas that are free. I know a lot of women struggle to spend money on themselves, and I don’t want you to not celebrate your wins because it’s expensive!
Here are a few free ways I like to reward myself:
Give yourself permission to take a nap
Uninterrupted Quiet time.
Drive to a beautiful neighborhood or park and go for a walk instead of taking your usual walking route.
Clean out your closet and donate all your too-big clothes to charity.
Post your progress on social media so your friends can celebrate with you.
Take a bubble bath.
Make your own ribbon or trophy.
If you want to spend some money on yourself, these ideas will be great rewards!
Plan a night out with your friends.
Buy a lottery ticket.
Subscribe to a fitness or healthy cooking magazine.
Buy a new workout song.
Get yourself a bottle of fancy shower gel or lotion.
Pick up a new plant for your garden.
Invest in some moisture-wicking workout socks.
Get fitted for a new sports bra.
Try a new shade of nail polish.
Busy yourself flowers
I want to encourage you to create your own list of non-food rewards! Everyone has something that makes them feel good or beautiful; think about what makes you feel good and use that as a reward! For me, I love getting my lashes done, so I use that as a reward all the time!
You can start creating a list in your phone so that you can quickly pull up an idea when you want to celebrate!
Implement this in your family
I believe that as moms when we make changes in our lives they trickle down to our families. The great thing about changing how you do rewards is that it’s so easy for you to implement as the mom! You can set a goal for your kids and then offer a non-food reward for it!
One thing to keep in mind is that it’s absolutely ok to make your kids wait for a reward! For example, my daughter wanted a new pair of Vans and instead of just buying them for her, I told her that her grades would be coming out in three weeks and if she reached her goals, we would get the shoes. She worked hard, got the grades she was aiming for and she got new shoes.
Delayed gratification is an amazing trait for kids to learn, especially in the days of instant downloads and Amazon Prime! We can even translate this trait to our food habits!
We use food to instantly satisfy our cravings, but this instant satisfaction can create unhealthy habits. I like to delay gratification for food with my kids because it teaches them that they don’t have to give into urges.
If they want to go out for dessert or grab fast food, make it a reward for reaching a goal instead. When they realize that they can have the food later, they learn that they don’t have to give into cravings! This will be an invaluable skill when they grow up and leave the house and are able to hit up Taco Bell any time they want!
Now, back to non-food rewards! Here are a few of my kids’ favorite non-food reward ideas:
Family game night
Eating in the living room
Go to the movies
Dance Party
Mom/kid day out
Go paddle boarding
Extra screen time
Stay up past bedtime
Go to a trampoline park
I’ve found that when I tailor the non-food reward to each of my kids’ preferences it’s much more effective! My oldest’s love language is quality time, so when given the option she’s much happier to just hang out without distractions than to go get food. Learn what your kids enjoy and turn those into rewards that actually make them feel good about themselves and improve relationships.
If you need help changing your food reward system for yourself or your family, then let’s chat! Schedule a free discovery call with me to learn more about creating healthy habits that will serve you and your family for generations to come.
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