How to keep living in gratitude after Thanksgiving so you can continue to feel peace and happiness during the tough times
November is the month of gratitude! As we head into Thanksgiving we all try to appreciate the small things in our life, but once the turkey is eaten and the Black Friday sales hit, we get out of the gratitude habit and it’s another year before we feel the peace and happiness daily gratitude brought us. If you want to keep the spirit of gratitude alive in your heart through the good times and the hard times, then these five tips can help you.
Before we dive into the 5 tips, I want to share a little lesson I learned with you that helped me learn how to find something to be grateful for even when life is especially challenging.
I used to think that life was supposed to be good 90% of the time and hard 10% of the time. When I was hit with challenge after challenge, after challenge I thought I had screwed up my entire life. Somehow I had managed to ruin my life - either by not doing something perfectly or because I had made one mistake that I was being punished for, for eternity, or at least it felt like that.
But, what I learned is that life isn’t supposed to be 90/10. It’s actually 50/50.
You haven’t screwed up or ruined anything when you’re going through a challenge. That challenge is just in your path to help you grow. Even the really, really sucky ones.
When you recognize that the hard times are meant to help you grow, it’s easier to find gratitude in your daily struggles. These five tips will also help you learn what to be grateful for and how to keep going when you don’t think you can.
Search for the positive
We’ve all been stuck in a negative experience where it looks like everyone and everything is against you. However, just because life is difficult in one aspect, doesn’t mean it’s difficult in every aspect! 💭 When you feel like things aren’t going how you want them to, ask yourself, “What are the positive areas in my life that aren’t being affected by my current challenges?”
Think back to the pandemic. Almost everything went wrong as we quarantined endlessly. People lost jobs, family members got sick, kids weren’t able to go to school. But, what went well during that time?
Families came closer together. We were able to slow down and focus on what mattered most. New businesses were started. We had time to meal plan and prep. We spent time with loved ones.
Just because things felt heavy and hard, it didn’t stop the good from coming. When you recognize that there is good, even in difficult times, you can appreciate each stage of life that you’re in.
Treasure the small details
When was the last time you treasured the small things? We focus on being grateful for the big things (a good job, healthy kids, a loving family,) but we often forget to appreciate the small things in our life.
One of the small details of my daily life that I treasure is drinking a hot cup of coffee before my family is up. Mama, you know the power of an uninterrupted cup of coffee, right! It’s a simple pleasure in life that often gets overlooked.
What small details in your life do you treasure?
Here are a few ideas to help open your mind to seeing the small things.
A fresh coat of paint in your bedroom to help brighten it up.
A completed project at work.
Finishing a good book.
A clean house - even if it’s only clean for five minutes.
Waking up on time, or even early!
Time to move your body.
Once you start looking for these small details to be grateful for, you’ll find more and more of them - it’s a scientific fact!
There is a system in your brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS.) The RAS is a filter that brings information to your attention. Its main function is to filter out the unimportant things and hone in on what you need to know, see, smell, etc.
The issue with the RAS is that it really hones in on what it thinks you want to take notice of. The classic example is when you’re buying a new car. Maybe you’re looking at a new Telluride. 👀 You hadn’t seen one before you started looking, but now that it’s on our mind you literally see them everywhere! That’s the RAS in action! It thinks you want to see more Tellurides, so it “pings” you anytime your subconscious sees it.
The RAS is an amazing function, but sometimes it can hone in on things we don’t actually want to see, like our pain. It just takes a few thoughts of, “Man, this is hard!” for your RAS to realize that you want more evidence of how hard life really is! The RAS now believes that pain is important to you, so it filters out the good and keeps showing you the pain.
The good news is that you’re in control of your RAS, not the other way around. You can retrain your RAS to start showing you the small treasures in your life by thinking about it and pointing them out to yourself. Over time, the RAS will pick those things up for you and it will become second nature.
Add joy to your daily schedule
It’s easy to get stuck in the difficult or mundane aspects of our day-to-day lives. We get caught up in school drop off and pick up. Running errands. Cooking dinner. Taking our kids to practices, games and lessons. Getting to bed at a decent hour. And we forget that we’re supposed to actually experience joy in our day-to-day lives.
Have you ever thought of scheduling time in your day for something that makes you happy? We usually think about doing that on a weekly or monthly basis - like going out for a girls night, or a solo trip to Target, but I’m talking about adding joy to your schedule every single day.
It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant, it just has to bring you joy!
Make time to listen to your favorite song.
Watch your guilty pleasure TV show.
Set aside time to read a book for pleasure.
Make plans to get out of the house and visit a friend.
Watch a funny video on YouTube.
Happiness doesn’t just happen to you. You don’t have to wait around for it. You can create it by choosing to make time for yourself, by prioritizing the things that bring you joy! When you begin to actively make joy and happiness a part of your daily life, you’ll create a life of gratitude!
Put your pain in perspective
Like I talked about before, life isn’t supposed to be 90% amazing and 10% hard. You’re going to experience a lot of problems and pain in your life. But it’s important that you don’t blow that pain out of proportion.
One thing to keep in mind is that you’re not the only person who is struggling. Despite what you may see on Instagram, everyone is facing something hard.
There are even people who are struggling with the same thing as you! You just don’t know about it yet. It can be helpful to connect with people who are struggling with similar issues and get support with your struggle. If you aren’t sure how to find support, look for a Facebook group! There’s a group for everything where you can find love and support.
It also might be helpful to find someone who is struggling more than you and find a way to help them. Unfortunately, someone always has it worse than you and you can either use that to help you find the good in your life or you can use it to continue feeling bad for yourself.
I promise that when you choose to use that to help someone else, you’ll make the world a much better place. I don’t like to compare challenges, but it can show you how much you have to be grateful for when you see that what you take for granted some people would die for.
Understand the power of change
Remember, this challenge isn’t permanent. Life will change. Your circumstances will change. How you feel about a situation will change. Nothing stays the same forever and sometimes you just have to wait the hard times out.
You can still show your gratitude by recognizing that change happens and can lead to better things. If you feel trapped and stagnant, keep in mind that a transformation is possible. It may take time, friends, effort, and perseverance, but you’ll get past your difficult situation.
Simply making the decision to be grateful for the change you’re going through and looking forward to the growth this opportunity has brought you can make a difficult time still a happy time.
Gratitude is a daily choice. It’s a gift we give ourselves so that we can be the best version of ourselves; better moms, better wives, better employees, better business owners. When you begin to practice gratitude you’ll see many changes in your life, but I hope that you see how wonderful you are and how much you deserve to feel peace and happiness year-round.
Save to Pinterest!